Ralph the Office Dog

I work with a Geologist in an office west of Temple. He has accrued a bunch of worthless shit over the years and has most of it in our shared office space. The bulk of this junk predates the 1980's, so it has a distinct odor of cigarettes, mothballs, and cheese fondue. There is a gem, however, amidst the scores of strange paintings and 3-d wall hangings. Ralph. Ralph is a porcelain basset hound who sits in the corner and sometimes takes the rap for slip-ups. One example was when Tim farted and said, "damn it, Ralph!" I laughed my ass off, and have since blamed Ralph for my misdeeds. Apparently, Ralph has left the front door unlocked, clogged up the commode, and spilled coffee on some maps. He wore a hardhat for a few months and looked damn good.